Notes from the game: 2016 Round 7 Carlton

The Pies, playing erratic and inconsistent football, lose to their arch-enemy.


The Footy Bogan reckons the Pies have become unwatchable.

There was a time, about 10 years ago, when we used to say, "I wonder which Collingwood will turn up today." During bad trots, we might even suggest that we didn't know which Collingwood would turn up from quarter to quarter. The current Collingwood cannot be relied on from one play to the next.

There will be a passage of play in which we look all right. Often a goal will result. Next minute, we're handballing to opponents, missing targets and producing clangers. It's not the high-speed, high-risk footy that sometimes comes unstuck; it's totally erratic. The Bogan is always prepared to wear the first; the second? Not so much.

When kids are very young, or really suck at something, there's no point trying to correct them; you just let them run around and have fun. The Pies are playing so badly and so erratically, their skills disappearing out of the blue, that there is no point critiquing or discussing. It's not like a little tweak, a slight adjustment to personnel will tune us to a state of perfection.

In 2009, Collingwood was just off the pace. The following year, with the topping up of the list with Jolly and Ball, the team hit just the right note.

The 2016 Collingwood is not in that league. Arguably it is not up to the standard of the AFL. I suspect that if Essendon, Freo and Richmond were not drawing some of the attention, Collingwood's plight would be unendurable. Not that it's any bed of roses currently. Were our competition a little more sensible, we'd be in danger of relegation.

The wrap

The Pies are playing unwatchable footy. I don't think I've seen one live game to the end this year.

At the moment, I can't see where a dramatic turn-around can come from. Any patch of good play may just be a false dawn, like the first half against Essendon.