... and is more than a little surprised that this is the first time he has used the word pejorative on this blog. Can it be?
Team Q1 Q2 Q3 Q4 Final Essendon Bombers 4.0 8.1 14.1 16.7 103 Collingwood Magpies 2.4 2.6 4.9 5.9 39
After the game I turned to my youthful companions and remarked that it had to be the worst Collingwood performance I had seen. They got into a spirited debate about other games, like Fremantle. I lost interest, because if the debate revolves around whether this was the worst performance ever or some other game, I think you lose sight of the big picture, which is that the performance was execrable.
There's little you can say after a game like that. I'll content myself with trivia. I read somewhere that it was Collingwood's lowest score since 1927.
In The Age yesterday, Jake Niall made some pretty salient points under a headline which said it all: "Collingwood coach Nathan Buckley blunders on Maxwell, Keeffe". It's online here.
In The Greatest Game Ever (the 2010 PF), Leigh Brown runs towards a ball loose on the wing, an opponent threatening. He manages a rover-like tap which makes the ball sit up for him, takes possession and kicks a Hail Mary. The ball is not at all on course; it looks like it will go out of bounds on the far side if two competing players don't reach it. But, lo, 25m out, the ball makes a vicious off-break worthy of a Murali with his arm bent to the max, and dribbles through for a goal. The commentator is heard to remark of Geelong that when things like that happen to you, you know the footy gods are not looking at you propitiously.
When Essendon had kicked 14.1 to three-quarter time, you could argue the same. They got to 15.1 before blotting their copybook. So after the event you could say that things weren't going our way. After 3 quarters, Collingwood was nearly matching Essendon for scoring shots, so in theory, we were in the game. But not really.
Inaccuracy alone does not explain the drubbing we got. What was paradigmatic of the day was a play that started about half back. Collingwood ran the ball forward through the centre with a chain of handballs. A goal was there for the taking. I think Young dropped a pass (which may have done him no favours); but he still had time. He scrabbled ineptly for the ball for an age in football terms and was subsequently swamped.
The wrap
Back in round 14 after the Hathorn game, I thought a top-4 finish unlikely. I also said we might not make the finals. That's looking near certain. To resurrect our season from here would require a performance of prime-ministerial proportions (like Lazarus with a triple bypass).
Sources
http://www.footywire.com/afl/footy/ft_match_statistics?mid=5899
Dear Mr TFB
ReplyDeleteI went to see the reserves play which was on a miserably cold Saturday afternoon and I was able to make some conclusions. Then there was the main game on Sunday afternoon – I think you are too gentle when you caption it as execrable.
For the first time ever I laughed at my team. Not just once, several times. I was reminded of the Keystone Cops.
Then there was the article by Jake Niall which I too read and gave full marks to.
The emphasis is on why put Keefe in the reserves – who are they punishing? There was no planned alternative in the firsts. Here we have a time when not only was there no plan B, C or D, there wasn’t even a plan A! If they want to punish a player for playing dumb week in and week out, why for example is Cloke immune? As I wrote two weeks ago, White did a very creditable job on Waite in the reserves playing at CHB. Perhaps, I thought, the master plan is to have him at CHB in the firsts. Nope, failed CHF again.
Jake Niall had also pinpointed the problem with Blair, who is I am sure a lovely fellow. However, as I have said, he has no position in the team. I would rather see the Irish boy Mooney in the forward pocket and who can put the afterburners on and so has a chance of scoring a Seedsman type goal .
Essendon is trained to play by numbers. When someone in the backline gets the ball, the other backmen immediately take up their assigned positions. They spread across the ground, Fletcher drops into the goal square for the transition pass and he moves the ball to the other pocket, who never got tagged. The key man is Fletcher. He had to have a tagger on him the whole time. He is nearly as old as you are, it isn’t a new tactic. The only time I saw him being tagged it was by – wait for it—Blair.
I have never seen Pendles play so woefully – he must be injured or unwell.
Macaffer failed to lay a finger on Heppel – what happened there?
Cloke did his usual running straight to where the ball could be kicked without once backtracking or deviating or knocking the ball over his head – or anything. He had two players going up against him in the marking contest each time and the umpires in their wisdom made no note of him always having an opponent’s arm around his waist.
In the reserves, the kid Broomhead was quite good – he should make it, the pickup from the Swans - Armstrong (who weighs the same as you) played well, the draft pick Marsh has lots and lots of potential and the rookie Martin looks a hard nut. Karnesis didn’t play (apparently injured his leg again), Reid had an easy afternoon and Fasolo even easier – neither are ripe yet. But Keefe wqs terrific.
We have found out today that sadly our backline general has had to make the decision to retire. He got the very best out of his ability and he is a true magpie hero.
So our stocks are the lowest I can remember. The coaches and selectors failed the team and they should be severely censured. The three pickups from other clubs have all failed. The draft picks from the previous year have not made any impression and have so far failed. Langton is probably tired out. The need for more 175 cm players is zero.
A sad time.
M